Jeff Kinney is pretty much the nicest guy you can hope to meet. Except when it comes to his brother, Patrick. The two of them have been locked in a battle for supremacy since they were young—a war that continues to this day.
Left in charge for an afternoon, Jeff never resorted to crude bullying when elaborate psychological warfare worked so much better. Convincing a trusting kindergartner that milk fuels superhero powers took weeks of patient effort, ending only at the summit of the town slide.
Later came a pilfered arm-wrestling championship belt made of construction paper, and an unbreakable household oath sworn on the word “honest.” Even as grown adults, the brothers still settled old scores late at night in the family room, dodging a mangy stuffed lion until their father came downstairs.
A short story from the acclaimed collection Guys Read: Funny Business, edited by Jon Scieszka.
Sibling Dynamics: From Patrick locking his older brother in the laundry room to a tense family-room standoff, payback is always on the table.Short Stories for Kids: A quick, hilarious look at childhood rivalry, featuring an Atari session interrupted by fake Smurf voices and a phantom roll of masking tape in the basement.Funny Books for Kids: Readers discover the hazards of dinnertime leftovers, including an ice-cold spaghetti meatball served with a straight face and blown on for minutes.Middle Grade Humor: An ambush from inside an empty backyard hot tub fails to rattle an unflappable younger brother.
